I'm rotating between depressed, anxious, irritable, really freaking mad, and apathy. And I'm experiencing hot flashes in the midst of 95+ temperature. Yesterday my best friend took me to McDonald's so we could drink cheap soda and visit. It was nice, but I kept spacing out. I miss KC more than I expected and I can't seem to bring myself to pack up the extra toys and toddler paraphernalia his mom left in her hurry to get going.
So, the bad - I don't have a real job, my step-dad has prostate cancer & my mom wants me to move five states over to help financially, my second son lives in the same city as my daughter & KC and wants me to move in with him, my youngest son (his bio-brother) wants this also and has been pestering me nonstop to commit to the move, and I hate change, hate moving, and don't want to leave my friends. But the chances of me finding a job/career in my field in our small town is slim, so I'm pretty sure a move is in the future.
The good - I'm healing, I've lost 20 pounds, I registered for classes for my Master's program and found out my residual check will be more and come sooner than I expected, which will help financially, I was rehired at the college I just graduated from as a part time tutor, I could live very frugally here during the school year.
Depression is a lying bitch (#The Bloggess). Things will get better, maybe not right away, but eventually.
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